Parenting Squad

Best of Parenting: The Boo-Boo Edition

Linsey Knerl — Sat, 11 Jul 2009 00:42:30 -0400

Being a Mom or Dad has its ups and downs, as well as its fair share of blood and guts. If you’ve ever felt alone in your quest for keeping the crying to a minimum and the Band-Aids well stocked, have no fear. This weekly roundup of the most insightful, ironic, and hysterical blog posts on childhood injury and illness will have you feeling like part of a not-so-exclusive club in no time.

Jane Roper’s Baby Squared blog over at Babble.com takes a short but sweet look at those pity kisses parents like to dole out when our kids get hurt. Drawing the line and limiting the butt-kissing to only the youngest, diapered kids is something we can all relate to.

You crafty Mamas will appreciate this post at Crafty Daisies that shows you how to make Boo-Boo Bags for teachers. (If you’re not in tune with buying 100 pounds of bulgur wheat, you can certainly trim your ambitions by just making one to start with.)

Medical care isn’t cheap, but that doesn’t mean you should sacrifice quality treatment for sick or injured children. This excellent list of tips from Mom Advice’s Amy gives you the basics for making sure everyone is well-cared for… and it boasts an average monthly savings of $20 or more!

Sometimes, all a parent has to go off of is one or two very general symptoms before a child becomes very ill. This Child Health Guide from Parenting.com is easy to navigate and covers most of the basics, including dehydration, eczema, and earache.

We’ve got quite a few great tips and stories here on ParentingSquad to ease your mind about what parents fear most – kids getting sick. Here are our favorites:

Medical Emergencies: Navigating Your Options

Are You Afraid Your Child Has the Swine Virus?

Let Them Eat Dirt

Chicken Pox Parties: Would You Take Your Kid to One?

Hey Moms! Go With Your Gut

Name That Cough: A Mom’s Guide to What Ails ‘Em

Pink Eye and The Small Guy: Get The Facts About Conjunctivitis

Heard any good health tips lately? Would you like to share your parenting and sick child story? Leave it in the comments, or email us at tips@parentingsquad.com. We might share your tips in our next article!

Permalink | Comments | Linsey Knerl's blog | Channel: Health

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Medical Emergencies: Navigating Your Options

Marla Walters — Thu, 09 Jul 2009 11:00:55 -0400

By Marla Walters

This is not an article filled with tricks to help you have your child seen more quickly in the ER. That would be irresponsible and detrimental to the system of an emergency room. I do, however, want to help you better understand the inner workings of an emergency room, in order to receive the best care possible for your child.

When an emergency strikes, knowing your options will alleviate some of the stress involved. First, here are the options for getting your child to the emergency room.

For severe emergencies, call 911. The operators can give you important advice while you are waiting for assistance.
For other emergencies, have a list of hospitals and Urgent Care clinics in your area ready so you can transport quickly.
Have an established relationship with a pediatrician or family practice doctor so you can call and get a hold of quickly. They may have advice about where you should go to receive the most appropriate care.

Emergency rooms operate on a system called “triage.” This means to classify, or sort, sick or injured according to the severity of the condition. Many of them now fortunately also run programs called “fast track.” You can usually receive faster medical assistance for symptoms such as sore throats, sprains, simple wounds, etc. You will most likely be seen by a P.A. or an experienced R.N., who is overseen by an ER physician.

When you arrive in an emergency room, symptoms are assessed according to that hospital’s triage system. Some use numbers; some use names. Examples:

Level 1: Patients who require immediate life-saving measures. Examples are cardiac arrest, critical injuries, and overdosing.
Level 2: This might be someone who has active chest pain, is disoriented, is in severe pain or a chemotherapy patient who is immunocompromised.
Levels 3-5: Here, a patient’s needs are assessed according to how many resources the patient may need to reach a diagnosis. For instance, a “3” might need lab or x-ray tests. A “4” probably needs an x-ray. A “5” needs an exam and possible medications.

Some use this nomenclature: Emergent, Urgent, Non-Urgent or Routine. The patient’s “chief complaint” is noted. This means the symptom, i.e., headache, leg pain, stomachache.

Imagine that your child sprains their ankle while playing ball. While painful and upsetting, you may have some options for treatment. Rather than assume you need to sit in an emergency room for hours, you might try the Urgent Care clinic or head for a hospital that has a Fast Track system. I would also call both first, to see how busy they are. People often become upset about the wait time in emergency rooms. What the public often does not know is that even if they think they are the “next in line” in an ER, it may have had an ambulance with Level 1 patients arrive at another entrance. Also, rooms are often full of Level 3-5 patients, awaiting exams or test results.

If you have time before heading to an emergency room or clinic, you might grab a small child’s blanket, a book or two, and a small snack. Some hospital cafeterias close after dinner service, and the healthiest options are not found in vending machines. My daughter makes fun of my huge purses but it is handy to have books and snacks available during a long wait. I also like to have change – your cell phone may not work inside the facility. You should also have a list of medications you or the child are taking and the quantities. This is important information for the staff. You should also be armed with your personal identification as well as your insurance card.

Keep in mind that the staff may be exhausted (they often don’t have time to take breaks or meals). Although you may be upset, it is still helpful to remain courteous and communicative.

Finally, if you have a really terrible or a great experience, this is very helpful information to the administrators of the facility. They want to know what works, and what doesn’t, and who their best employees are.

Permalink | Comments | Marla Walters's blog | Channel: Health

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Feed the Pig and Win!

Lynn Truong — Tue, 07 Jul 2009 21:36:24 -0400

By Lynn Truong

A study commissioned by the AICPA shows that for every dollar of assets owned by 25-34 years old in the United States, they are carrying 70 cents worth of debt.

I'm sure you've seen the commercials with "spokespig" Benjamin Bankes, trying to spread the word and remind everyone to feed your piggy bank.

Feedthepig.org was created to provide tools and information to help young adults proactively change their spending habits. These tools provide young adults with a reality check while empowering them to take simple actions to change their behaviors regarding money to start saving today.

Feed the Pig offers lots of cool stuff:

Pick a personality similar to yours in Me Save? Then choose a set of spending habits you want to change or break and find out how much you can save over a month, a year or even 35 years!
Sync your Feed the Pig profile with Facebook or your iGoogle Homepage to track what you can save over time.
Find out how much you can save no matter what course your life takes in the 5% Challenge.
Take a quiz to see how well you understand the psychology behind our saving and spending habits.
Get savings tips, which you can rate and comment on.
Talk to others about how they “Feed the Pig.”
Watch and listen to Feed the Pig TV and radio ads.
Learn a ton more about saving through our Resources section and our companion site, 360financialliteracy.org, which has advice for people at all stages of life.

Feed the Pig is part of a national campaign sponsored by the AICPA and The Advertising Council to encourage and help Americans aged 24-34 to take control of their personal finances.

To help spread the word, they sent us 6 prize packs to give away to Parenting Squad readers. The prize packs include a piggy bank, stress ball, key chain, and weepul, all inspired by “spokespig” Benjamin Bankes.

Help spread the word by leaving a tip for young adults to save money, and be entered to win a prize pack! Drawing ends on July 20. Only open to U.S. residents aged 18 and over, void where prohibited. Only one entry per person will be counted.

Permalink | 14 comments | Lynn Truong's blog | Channel: Family Planning, Finances

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Best of Parenting: Celebration Edition

Linsey Knerl — Fri, 03 Jul 2009 19:13:09 -0400

By Linsey Knerl

Today is my birthday (and my husband’s birthday.) With each passing year, things get a bit more stressful, and a little less… celebratory. Perhaps I’m lacking in motivation, but I’d like to think that I just need a little inspiration. Thank goodness for these truly amazing, delicious, and simple ways to celebrate all of life’s finer things – compliments of experts from all over the web! (Now I have no excuses.)

Like Merchant Ships took party planning to a whole new level with her entire series of photo posts and commentary on how to pull off the best (and most budget-friendly) Lego Birthday Party. My favorite tip? “Use what you have.” Bless this woman.

How to Make LEGO Birthday Party Invitations

LEGO Birthday Decorations from Board Game

LEGO Birthday Parties: Use What You Have

Ultimate LEGO Birthday Party: Cost and Resources

Amy at Mom Advice not only shares what there is to love about The World’s Greatest Homemade Slushies, but also how they can’t be done without indulging in a bit of sugar. (Any excuse to make things sweeter is a good one, in my opinion.)

Cookie monsters and cranberry fans will totally dig this recipe for Red, White, and Blueberry Cookies from Stop and Smell the Chocolate. What’s really cool about this recipe is that it can be given as a gift, via dry ingredients layered into a pretty glass jar. (You can even omit the blueberries if you’re feeling extra frugal.)

How could I even discuss celebrations without mentioning my favorite holiday (Independence Day) and my favorite party food (cake)? This last link is a selection of 4th of July cakes gone horribly wrong from Cake Wrecks – in full patriotic color! If you thought your last party cake was a bit off kilter, you have to see these!

When Moms and Dads stop celebrating because it’s too much of a burden, then we need to stop and examine how things ever got so complicated. Take some advice from those who seem to have a grasp of simplicity, and don’t be afraid to ask for help. Parents are a pretty supportive and fun bunch, you know!

Permalink | 1 comment | Linsey Knerl's blog | Channel: Home Life, Entertainment

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4 Really Cool Green (and Blue and Red) Art Projects for Kids

Linsey Knerl — Sat, 27 Jun 2009 19:24:56 -0400

By Linsey Knerl

I love preassembled art crafting kits for kids. Recent budget-tightening and an increased interest in recycling, however, have led to some new opportunities to get especially creative with our homeschool craft routine. Check out the four top picks from our dining room table, and see how they can be adapted to fit your creative time!

Robots

I don’t remember my daughter having an interest in robots, but for my three sons (ages 5, 4, and 2), they rule over dinosaurs every time. (My youngest son’s first phrase was “I am a robot” spoken in monotone.) Since my freelance/consulting business includes getting many deliveries a day, there is never a shortage of cardboard boxes in my home. I am careful to nest the boxes inside one another, giving my kids 5-7 at a time to play with (the smaller, the better). These are boxes I’m not going to get back, so I don’t give them anything too unique (foam-insulated cooler boxes, for example.)

Then I turn them loose with some markers, toilet paper tubes, and a whole slew of kitchen utensils and blunt workshop tools. They use everything from rubber spatulas to cloth tape measures to create the perfect robot, and they work together for hours at a time. When they are finished, they have usually produced a crazy mess of boxes and clutter, but they did have fun! (We then use the decimated boxes for wood stove starter or let them break down in the compost heap.)

Bubble Wrap Mosaic

This idea came to me after I received a rather brilliantly blue-colored bubble wrap envelope in the mail. It looked too good to throw away, but was impractical for my own mailing needs. I saved it for a rainy day, and when that day came, I cut it up into varying sizes of geometric shapes and covered the back of each with a thin layer of Elmer’s Glue. I set them in front of my kids, along with a piece of construction paper, and let them get to work! Here is what we came up with:

Beautiful! Unique! Totally recycled!

Newspaper “Fireworks”

These are an easy way to recycle your Sunday paper (especially the color pages.) We take several sheets of the paper, and run them through the paper shredder or use a paper cutter to make thin strips. Each child is then given a handful or two of the shreds and a sheet of colored paper. I allow them to each have a glue stick, and they can make designs on the colored paper with the stick, before affixing the newspaper shreds to the sticky surface. It looks like fireworks!

Juice Carton Houses

My kids love playing with boxes, but when I want to keep things to a smaller scale (and limit the mess to one table), I opt for orange juice or lemonade cartons. After rinsing the cartons and allowing them to dry overnight, I cut the bottom from the carton and let the kids use safety scissors to do their thing! They make windows, doors, add decorations, and paint the sides. They can use their imaginations to make the house of their dreams, and then they march action figures or little play people through the doors. They love it!

What cool DIY recycling art projects do you enjoy with your kids?

Permalink | Comments | Linsey Knerl's blog | Channel: Home Life, Education, Entertainment, Home School, Pre School, K-8

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Let's Go Clubbing: What's the best organization for your child?

Marla Walters — Fri, 26 Jun 2009 11:07:45 -0400

By Marla Walters

I can still recite the 4-H pledge and, with a little coaxing, the Girls Scouts’ pledge as well. Yes, I was in both of those organizations, as well as others. My daughter liked Daisies (beginning Girl Scouts) but the Brownies lost her interest. She loved Junior Greenpeace, but the Key Club wasn’t her thing. Should your child join a club?

You might think club membership is something you don’t need to worry about. However, if you are the parent of an eight or nine-year-old, the flyers and school announcements are coming. Your kid might not seem interested in Boy Scouts, but when most of his friends join, he’ll re-think it. When her friends show up in matching t-shirts, she may want one, too. I’ve been there. Should you give in to peer pressure, even if you don’t think a particular club is the right match for your child?

Any above-board organization will let you come observe a meeting or two. It’s okay to ask questions, and to do your own research. Here are some items you should consider.

What are some of the benefits of club membership?

Socialization
The opportunity to learn new things
Acquiring leadership skills
Learning how to be a good community member and citizen

What are some areas a parent should look into?

How often does the club meet?
What are the costs (for example: dues, uniform, etc.)?
What are the expectations for fund-raising?
If my child enjoys this organization, for how long can he or she continue membership?
Which organization is the best match for my child?
Are parents encouraged to also help out?

Let’s discuss that last question some more. Many of these clubs/organizations do need, and encourage, a parent’s help. I have had both good and bad experiences with this. It was fun to be a co-leader, helping with crafts, in Daisies . . . but when I ended up with having to go to unit meetings and pay bills, in Brownies, the fun stopped. Also, my daughter was ready to try something else, but we were stuck with responsibilities. My advice, if you think you might want to help, would be to be careful about how much you take on. It gets easier in high school, when your kids have a more defined idea of their interests.

There are many clubs available – too many to mention all of them, so I looked into four of the most famous ones for this article.

Most surprising to me were the 4-H programs. While kids can still learn sewing and how to raise sheep (two of my favorites, when I was 10), new programs include “Wind Energy” and “Theatre Arts.” I have always liked 4-H’s emphasis on healthy living and citizenship – but am also impressed by their program promoting science and technology.

The Girl Scouts organization, going strong since 1912, also is big on helping girls to acquire “Character and skills for success in the real world.” Not only is camping still listed in their programs (that was fun) but now there is an entire college planning section.

The Boy Scouts of America, another very old, solid organization, has also changed with the times. Note the girls on the home page! A friend of my daughter’s, now a college sophomore, just received his Eagle Scout status. Talk about an organization that can grow with your child.

I had not heard much about the Camp Fire organization (no Councils in my state) but they are still going strong. Who can argue with their statement: “Camp Fire USA develops personal resilience, intellectual curiosity, and social values.”

Do your homework and spend some time observing. Hopefully, you will find a club that is fun (the most important aspect, I think) and enriching.

Permalink | Comments | Marla Walters's blog | Channel: Extra Curricular

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The Importance of Play

Fred Lee — Thu, 25 Jun 2009 16:56:54 -0400

By Fred Lee

I don’t know about you, but I seem to see a lot of this lately: despite the fact that they complain incessantly about their kids having no free time to just hang out, parents continue to schedule organized events and activities, thereby ensuring that their children will have no free time to just hang out.

The question is, is it such a big deal? Do kids really benefit from having more and more organized (and supposedly enriching) activities, or is it important for them to have some free “down time” inside their own heads, engaging in unstructured play?

Well, according to a recent article in Scientific American, it just may be the latter. In fact, there is a growing body of evidence that there are indeed negative consequences to an absence of unstructured playtime in our children’s lives, to the point that pathological behavior may be the end result, including a life of crime.

While that may be extreme, more experts are acknowledging that free-play for children is important and should not be sacrificed for more organized activities. And while psychologists can’t seem to agree about its causal relationship with bad behavior (as a child and/or an adult), they are in agreement over one thing: spontaneous play is a good thing.

Free play, without rules or structure, fosters creativity and imagination, while also requiring children to become more self sufficient and able to entertain themselves. Some believe that even makes kids smarter. When children play together without set rules, it requires strong social skills and teaches them, out of necessity, about cooperation and fairness while also nurturing effective skills in communication.

Though organized sports and activities have their time and place, there is something to be said about having fun and playing where adults are not even remotely involved, something that I grew up with (as I’m sure many of you reading this did, as well) yet is an increasingly rare occurrence in the modern world.

I’ll readily admit that I’m no expert on the subject, but as a parent, I have noticed that when children grow up with no free time, it seems to me that like begets like. In other words, kids who are over-scheduled so that they are never bored seem to get bored more easily, because in the absence of regular scheduled programming, they have a harder time entertaining themselves and are at a loss for what to do besides watching TV.

Furthermore, many of these activities come with a cost, whether it be in terms of money, time, quality of life, and even our health. Sure, the monetary expense can be negligible, especially if they are administered through schools or recreation centers, but private leagues or lessons can cost you a bundle, and that’s not even factoring in all of the lost time.

For the amount of time it requires to take part in these events can be enormous. Time, mind you, that might be better spent together as a family, enjoying a wholesome home-cooked meal instead of something you heat up in a microwave, or even getting more sleep. And let’s not forget about all of the stress that it entails.

On the other hand, letting your kids have unstructured playtime can be as simple as letting them romp around in the backyard or upstairs in their bedroom while you relax with a cup of tea. Yet, in light of this, we seem to push free time further and further out of the picture.

Why this the case is anyone’s guess, but like most things in life, especially with parenting, the reasons are probably not so simple and straightforward. After all, I think it’s fair to say that parents (for the most part) have their children’s best interests in mind. Furthermore, in the intensely competitive world that we live in, who doesn’t succumb to the notion that children need a leg up to succeed?

Maybe it just boils down to achieving some balance, and asking yourself why you’re doing what you’re doing. If it feel like all the schedules and activities are spiraling out of control, it might not be a bad idea to take a step back and simply let children be themselves.

If you aren’t sure how, just remember when you were young and it will all come back to you.

Permalink | Comments | Fred Lee's blog | Channel: Home Life

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When Bedtimes Are A Bad Idea

Linsey Knerl — Sun, 21 Jun 2009 22:57:11 -0400

By Linsey Knerl

We've all done it: allowing children to stay up way past their bedtime because putting them to bed was too difficult, impractical, or annoying. While I can admit to having done this a few times, generally I ignore reasonable bedtime hours in lieu of a time that will actually benefit my child in the long run. Here are the instances where letting the kids stay up has advantages for everyone:

Illness

Kids with fevers, coughs, or new teeth most certainly need their rest. With them feeling under the weather, however, rules regarding eating, drinking, and TV time are probably being broken, anyway. So why do parents feel that a strict bedtime should continue even through the sickness? I like to look for clues that kids need sleep and allow them to snooze whenever, wherever – until they get back to normal. If this means that they crash during the day and stay up watching Blues Clues all night, that's cool with me: Whatever gets them healthy and keeps them feeling loved in the process.

Trauma

Another reason to forgo rigid scheduling for bedtime is when there has been a devestating event in the family. A death, moving to a new location, or another life-altering occurance that may be met with anxiety or anger from the kids is certainly a good enough excuse to allow kids to get back on a good schedule, as they choose. While parents have a role in encouraging them to lay down and rest for a bit, if they show signs of not being able to rest happily, let them stay up for a bit (reading books, cuddling, listening to music) until they can doze off peacefully.

Unique Opportunities

While putting kids to bed can be a long-anticipated happening when guests visit or you are on vacation, sometimes it's even more appropriate to let them stay up and hang out. Grandma in town for a once-in-a-lifetime dinner event, the viewing of a meteor shower, presidential election results, or New Year's celebrations are all reasons to party with the little ones in participation. Life only happens once, right?

Some of you may be thinking “What about school? Work? Getting up at a decent hour?” To this, I admit that I have a response you might not like. I have adjusted my life to be able to do these things without too much interruption to those things we must do. I freelance, homeschool, and work when I'm most productive. By following my kids' cues to what they need (more sleep, less naps, earlier bedtimes, etc.) I trust that I can give them the sleep they need – without forcing them to miss out on those important things we love.

Permalink | 4 comments | Linsey Knerl's blog | Channel: Discipline, Home Life, Health

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Teaching Children Dollars and Cents

Sarah Peppel — Thu, 18 Jun 2009 16:27:01 -0400

By Sarah Peppel

Last weekend, I went on a cleaning spree around my house, putting my kids to work every time they dared enter my sight. I even offered a little bit of earning incentive. My youngest took me up on my vague promise and helped me mop the kitchen floor and straighten the downstairs.

When we were done, she says to me, “Now wasn't all that worth $10?”

I replied, “No, it is worth $5.” I then proceeded to tell her that when I had recently worked a day on a minimum wage job it took me an hour to earn that much after taxes were taken out. If she wanted $10, she needed to do more work. She dissappeared and I saved the second $5 by doing the job myself.

Teaching my girls about money is tough for me because I would love to give my kids the world. I would love for them to be unburdened by the struggles of finances at such a tender age but spoiling them doesn't do them or me any good and I have had to learn that the hard way.

There are several positive steps to teaching children finances so that they can understand and carry on the lessons into adulthood. In her recent book, “Learning to Live Financially Free,” Marybeth Whalen has teamed up with her husband to share their financial struggles and how they found financial freedom through creating a plan and sticking to it. Raising six children, the Whalens had to learn how to budget, shop wisely and pass on their lessons quickly if the whole family was going to be free of unhealthy debt.

Some of the suggestions they give for teaching money values to children are as follows:

Teach children the difference between needs and wants.

Teach them how to bargain shop.

Have them earn money to pay for the extras, like texting on a cell phone or expenses for a big trip.

Encourage them to work as soon as they are able.

Work with them to help others, giving back to society.

Have your child start tracking his or her own spending if he or she is always out of money.

Open a savings account.

Play board games about money management or have them read books on it.

Children need to see that you are serious about using your money wisely. They will learn from your choices if you bring them in and make them part of the process.

Permalink | 2 comments | Sarah Peppel's blog | Channel: Finances

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When Kids Lie

Sarah Peppel — Wed, 17 Jun 2009 15:56:42 -0400

By Sarah Peppel

Proud of myself for finding my daughters' favorite treats on sale, I bought each of them a Reese's big peanut butter cup. Coming home, I placed them near the microwave where I could control who ate them, making sure that neither daughter overindulged. The day got away from me and I forgot all about them until much later when I looked and there were no treats in sight.

Asking my daughters about them, I received a definite “no, I didn't see them” from both girls. I knew my husband wasn't home yet, who very well could have been a likely culprit. I know I didn't eat them, leaving my beagle who has accomplished some amazing feats when it comes to sniffing out food but I also knew that I had placed them safely out of her reach.

Looking around the house, I quickly found torn up wrappers behind the sofa where the dog might have stashed them but probably would not have done so in such a neatly planted manner.

Again questioning my daughters, for whom the treats were intended to begin with, one acknowledged that she did indeed eat one peanut butter cup but that the other one, which she did admit to opening, fell to the floor where the dog gulped it up. This admission came after trying to pin the whole event on our innocent pet.

I certainly didn't have a problem with my daughter eating one of the treats but the length she went to cover it up just in case the treats were for some other purpose, just in case she might get in trouble, floored me. I realized that some kids lie to get out of trouble and some kids like to see what they can get away with and some kids do both – and I'm only in the pre-teen years.

Suddenly now, I am on high alert. I have tried to teach my children honesty and integrity. How do you regain trust when a child has a tendency to push the limit and starts testing the waters with little white lies? This Reeses incident is only one of several lately.

If you are facing the same issues, start by watching their eyes. When my daughter won't look at me, I know immediately to ask more questions.

Second, try not to sound suspicious until you find out more. I don't want my kids thinking I never trust them because sometimes they really didn't do it.

Third, hug and praise him or her when he or she does things right as positive reinforcement for good behavior. At the same time, my daughter was grounded from playing with friends for a day for the Reeses cup incident because I'm not going to reward bad behavior either.

Finally, give your full attention when she or he is asking a question. Too many times, I have let my daughter get away with something because she asked when I was distracted and didn't have time to think through the implications of her questions, like asking to play at a friend's until after bedtime. As much as I love her, I can also say she knows what she wants and is getting smarter all the time. I let her know I care by thinking through each request and being clear in the explanation for my “yes” or “no.” She doesn't always like it but respects that I have an answer and reason for my decisions.

Yes, I do get angry if she keeps pushing and my voice does raise a couple of decibels when I have to say, “For the last time, no.” Kids need to see you mean business but also need the balance of love and the willingness of a parent to apologize if their anger gets out of control. Discipline is tough but by staying on top of the issues in advance, many problems can be avoided on the offensive rather than the defensive or after the fact.

Permalink | 1 comment | Sarah Peppel's blog | Channel: Discipline

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